Jokes – freshness guaranteed

March 31, 2013

The difference between a mother and a mother-in-law

Filed under: All in the Family,Mother-in-law — pramath @ 10:51 AM

A mother knows everything.

A mother-in-law suspects everything.

October 11, 2012

My hypertension


My hypertension = Genes from my mother + Triggers from my mother-in-law

February 25, 2010

Courage to publish mother-in-law’s jokes

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:19 AM

You might wonder how I gathered courage to write jokes about my mother-in-law!

Actually I asked for the permission – and I got it!!!

… Only with these words though:

“Of course, you should go ahead and publish these jokes! That way a part of my personality will be immortalized.

It  also doesn’t matter much. Who reads joke blogs anyway?

Mother-in-law strikes again

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:11 AM

She was all happy about seeing her daughter driving a shiny big car.

She was all happy about seeing a well-run country – especially California.

She was telling all these wonderful things to her friend over a long-distance call.

“You know what? My son-in-law took us distance from our home-town to Chennai in his own car to show some of the best places! …

… And what do I tell you about this wonderful country! Even the most wretched people, living on the mercy of government have a car!”

English!

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:07 AM

Somehow most sincere hearts are also most self-doubting.

Take for example my mother-in-law’s.

She was so self-conscious about being a non-native-English speaker when she visited us first time in the US that once she said:

“You know what, it is really different English here. Yesterday I was watching a program on the TV and could not understand a word!”

“Well, mom, you *do* understand a lot of English!”

“But I couldn’t!”

“What program were you watching?”

“El Mundo!”

“Mom, that is a SPANISH program and none in the family knows a word from that language!”

January 9, 2010

One in a million sons-in-law

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 2:50 PM

(Thursday, 7 July 2005)

On Monday my mother-in-law described me as “one-in-a-million” sons-in-law.

On Tuesday my mother-in-law claimed she could find thousands of sons-in-law like me.

I finally could reconcile the two opinions about me.

On Wednesday, I realized population of India is more than a billion!

American laundry

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:30 AM

(Friday, 21 May 2004)

My parents-in-law from India were visiting us in the US.

One day I saw my mother-in-law exhausted to near death. I asked why.

“Oh, this American laundry system!”

“What is wrong with it?”

“I forgot how many quarters it needed to wash. I took one too less. I had to walk across the whole apartment complex to get a new one!”

“Oh sure that is tiring in this summer.”

“That is not all. When I went back for drying cycle, I took one quarter too more. I again had to walk across the whole apartment complex to put it back. Then I went back and deposited proper number of quarters – I shuttled around for half a day! Oh dear, I am so tired!”

Why am I treated as I am

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:27 AM

(Friday, 21 May 2004)

(Please read the introduction before reading the joke. Indian parents-in-law really treat their son-in-law like a king.)

Not satisfied with the way my mother-in-law was pampering me (like a King), my father-in-law said: “My mother used to say you should keep your son-in-law ‘in your palms’ (with utmost care).”

She snapped back : “Oh, I am following that advice. I even follow what my mother tought me – to ‘let the son-in-law spit in your palms’ (spoil him rotten).”

No wonder I was a victim of two very respectable but conflicting angles of treatment of a son-in-law.

Meticulous highway design of the US

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:24 AM

(Friday, 21 May 2004)

My parents-in-law from India were visiting us in the US.

My mother-in-law was very much impressed by the highway system of the United States. One day we were driving on I-880 and it started raining. Upon return she reported to my wife:
“You should really appreciate the roads out here. It rained so much but they were not at all slippery. And you know what, those over-passes were so wide that it did not rain underneath at all!”

I must have missed the next sentence: “How carefully have they designed those overpasses so that drivers can get a little relief from rain!”

Cleaning up the refrigerator

Filed under: Mother-in-law — pramath @ 11:21 AM

(Friday, 21 May 2004)

My parents-in-law from India were visiting us in the US.

Once an ex-colleague of my mother-in-law called her up one evening while I was cleaning up spilled milk from refrigerator.

The caller asked : “By the way, what is your son-in-law doing?”
“Oh, he is just sitting there, *cleaning up* the refrigerator!”
The other end replied: “What a glutton you have got as the son-in-law!”

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