Jokes – freshness guaranteed

September 23, 2011

Simplified Chinese

Filed under: Math, Science, Technology and Environment,Savit — pramath @ 5:16 AM

Our team was migrating our software to Simplified Chinese.

Savit was worried.

He was not sure how Operating System will be chopping a process instead of forking it!

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January 16, 2010

The jump instruction

Filed under: Savit — pramath @ 7:33 AM

(Thursday, 3 July 2008)

Q: Why do Savit’s programs never work?

A: Because computers have instructions to jump to a specific location – not to jump in the dark!

Legend of Savit and Computers

Filed under: Savit — pramath @ 7:01 AM

(Tuesday, 3 June 2008)

Once computers in Savit’s lab were down.

After much effort, IT department got one of them up to display at least something.

The display read: “Stop Savit from Programming! We are on strike!”

Legend of Savit’s first programming exam

Filed under: Savit — pramath @ 6:59 AM

(Tuesday, 3 June 2008)

Savit spilled a lot of tears, sweat and blood in learning BASIC for his first programming class.

In the next class, he was supposed to learn C – but he could not get a thing!

In the practical exam, Savit was assigned to sort an array of integers using C. Savit started negotiating with his examiner and got it down to printing greater of two numbers.

The examiner clearly told him there will be no negotiation about moving from C to BASIC.

At last, Savit wrote the program in BASIC and at the end added a statement:

100 GOTO C

Savit is disconnected

Filed under: Savit — pramath @ 6:57 AM

(Tuesday, 3 June 2008)

Savit’s mobile (cell) bill used to be more than his entire family combined. His dad was at the end of his wits trying to stop him SMSing (texting) to his dozens of girlfriends.

One day Savit entered owner’s name in Savit’s cell phone. He entered “Savit”.

The microprocessor inside his phone got so scared, it stopped working. [There is something called racial memory.]

Savit tried changing a few cell phones. It seems the number is known on the network and no cell phone works anymore on Savit’s number.

Savit is disconnected and his father is relieved.

Touching sensitive business plans

Filed under: Savit — pramath @ 6:55 AM

(Tuesday, 3 June 2008)

Microsoft announced that Windows 7 will have touch functionality.

Rumor goes around in Bangalore that Steve Balmer thought of Savit and delayed the release.

It is believed that they are building protection against “inappropriate touch” in Windows 7 now.

Savit’s recursion

Filed under: Savit — pramath @ 6:53 AM

(Tuesday, 3 June 2008)

Savit wrote his first recursive program. (Initially he thought recursive program would not work without repeatitively cursing it.)

Anyway, this is how compilation reportedly went:

> gcc fibonacci.c

gcc: request: slap me if you want but please don’t compile this kind of source!

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